'EVERYONE HERE IS STUPID, SO I HIRED A FEW COACHES'

We've been blogging for 7 years, and millions of people have read our articles, but perhaps this fundamental point is still missing from the posts. However, it is relatively important. Improve what can be improved.

And no, not everything can be improved. Not everything in adulthood, especially not everything through coaching. So, the above statement, which came from an incredibly dynamic, motivated, strong, confident, intelligent senior executive, I think yesterday, was nonsense. Unfortunately.

Obviously, somewhere deep down, he knows it too, because he immediately asked me to keep my opinion to myself. He knows it won't help, but at least HR will be happy. That's another perspective.

Besides, there are no competent human being in the market, so we can't fire the underperformers anyway. We don't know why we have to send poor people to coaching, even though we say that. By the way, it's an interesting statement that we'll be pondering for a while, provided you are up to date on the development of domestic demographic trends and you look at more than just the truly discouraging inflation figures. The labor market seems to be more complex in real life than what was simply affected by macroeconomics and the unemployment curve.

So the stupid ones will remain, but now they also have a coach, and Csaba laughed heartily at this point. So, in various situations, hiring a coach for someone, it is more than unneccesary. Let's list a few without claiming to be exhaustive. And when you next consider something like this, go through the ultimate 'when not to hire a coach for your colleagues' list beforehand, and only then dial the number.

So, when should you not hire a coach for your team member?

1. If the person doesn't want it. This is the most important, even more important than Csaba's proposition. We have talked about it many times. Coaching helps in self-awareness, aiming for behavioral change. If they don't want it, they won't change their behavior. If they don't want it, they won't look in the mirror. And that's perfectly fine. Hire them a coach if they want it.

2. If you think the person is stupid. Not a kind expression, but still realistic, and we hear it often. It won't help with cognitive abilities or their absence. It won't help if you've already decided that the person is unsuitable for something. "Give them another coach, and if that doesn't help, I'll give up on them." It's better to give up now. It's better for them, for you, and for the coach.

3. If you've decided what the final outcome of coaching will be. "It would be nice if you worked on wanting to take my place already." A coach won't work on that. At most, they will help the person decide whether they want to take your place. But there's a substantial difference.

4. If you don't give them time for change. When they started learning meaningful communication, they still had daisies as their emblem, but now you think we're going to rebuild their relationship with authority, their authority issues, persuasion skills, mood swings, emotional regulation difficulties three times sixty minutes. We won't. We won't, and they won't in that time either. What you can expect is for them to notice what they're doing, become aware of it, and maybe start learning to control it in time. Not change it, not prevent it, not make it disappear.

5. If you don't trust them. If after every other session you call the coach and ask, "Isn't it hopeless?" then if you have a reasonable coach, they won't even attend the third meeting. Because it's pointless. Either believe that they want and can change, and hire them a coach, or don't believe it and leave them as they are. There's no other version; it really is as black and white as it sounds.

   
   

And we could go on listing endlessly, but perhaps the most important five propositions are mentioned above. So if as a senior executive, you feel that "everyone here is stupid," then maybe you should review your selection processes because most likely you're the one who hired the majority of them.

Or move on :)

After all, "one day you'll die, and you'll either go to hell or to Hadleyburg! CHOOSE THE FIRST ONE INSTEAD"* *Of course, Mark Twain!! But from which of his novels?